I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
