No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Randomize
