they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
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