Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize