was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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