brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
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