Screwed.edu
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
Randomize
