dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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