i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
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