real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Randomize
