How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
I have post one night stand depression
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Randomize
