One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
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