Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
