Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
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