She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Randomize
