If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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