That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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