Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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