What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
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