Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
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