So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
