also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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