ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
How external is "for external use only"?
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Randomize
