well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
