I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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