Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
