Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Randomize
