I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
More tranny stories later!
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
Operation Purity has been aborted
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
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