What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
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