He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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