i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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