Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
