Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Randomize
