Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
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