He uses pillows to masturbate.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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