5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
Dignity is for republicans.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
