the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
