so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
