is your mom at the bar?
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Randomize
