at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
you have to choose: penises or morals?
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Still dying that you shit outside
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
