Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
Randomize