I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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