She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I hope mine doesn't look like that
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
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