i think my tv is drunk
On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize
