Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Randomize
