that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize