There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
