Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
Randomize
