Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Do you have feelings for this penis?
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
