she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
I need moral support for this bender
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Randomize
