Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
Less talking, more tequila
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Randomize
